It seems life ...

It seems that the life that we have hoped for and how we perceived it was all wrong after all, doesn't it?

Well, at least i hoped this life to be more fun and happy. With each year it is proving to be misleading belief. Of course now and then i feel extremely happy and overall i would rate it OK, but still there is something missing or at least stability of happiness and satisfaction seems to almost impossible to achieve.

I have been raised on belief that life depended on loving, caring, friendship, sincerity etc. but definitely not on money or material possessions. However, after 30 years of living, i think i got it all wrong. Definitely above definition is true in family surroundings, but beyond that, even at close relative level like uncle, niece etc., it just doesn't matter anymore. "Everyone for themselves". That us the golden rule. Why would people misguide their children and teach and raise them on empty hopes and beliefs? I'm not saying that all people are bad or liars, or its so hard to find love and care, but we have to admit loving, caring, true friendships are hard to maintain and gruesome experience to keep them at high level. "True love exists only between parents and children". I have read something like this somewhere, and i was wondering if it was true. Now i can say that 90% of this statement is definitely true. Myself, haven't found true romantic love yet, so leaving out that 10% just in case ;)

My personal experience dictates to my brain that my parents definitely love me. My child loves me. I have only few good friends, with half of which i don't really share my personal life. It is hard for me to define true and best friendship. Do my colleagues care for me? Do many friends truly love me? Does someone like "a cute guy" will love me?

Bottom line from my recent events shows that people do not remember nice things you have done for them. How you supported them, how you made them happy, how you been through happiness and sadness together. One remembers the last mischief, how you hurt them, or how you said or done something that made them mad. How you acted, etc. Just try to remember the last time you have argued, or broken up, or simply had a fight. Have they remembered before or during the quarrel, how you were nice or done something for them? If not, how can they love me or you?

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