There was one time when I tried to cheat :) Well, I think it is OK to talk about this incident now, as I have separated from my husband few years ago. I just would like to share the story with you and it is up to you if you enjoy it, learn from it, or just forget it after reading it.Well, it was warm summer day. I was about to be married to my boyfriend and leave to study abroad.
The initial excitement of our relationship was down and it was turned into routine traditions of every couple. Home, work, home and again work, causal sex now and then. We used to live with our parents, so he used to come late evenings only. He told me he was always busy, but I guess he felt uneasy living with his in-laws. Plus, as we went along his affection and care have gotten smaller, lower, or colder, whatever you wanna name it. I was tired of begging him to kiss me, hold me, etc.
The initial excitement of our relationship was down and it was turned into routine traditions of every couple. Home, work, home and again work, causal sex now and then. We used to live with our parents, so he used to come late evenings only. He told me he was always busy, but I guess he felt uneasy living with his in-laws. Plus, as we went along his affection and care have gotten smaller, lower, or colder, whatever you wanna name it. I was tired of begging him to kiss me, hold me, etc.
Well, anyways, I think most of you who are married or in long-term relationships understand the setting I was in. Then, that warm summer day, my ex called me. He was in US, as far as I knew, and I was pretty surprised to hear from him. We talked this and that, exchanged greetings etc. and he invited me for a coffee.
I was excited. Probably, it was just gloomy days ,that I was spending with my boyfriend, and I just wanted to have some momentum excitement. So, I agreed to meet my ex. Bad decision No. 1.
I wanted to see him, as we had good time. It was nice to see him. We had coffee, he had nostalgic chat, remembering the good times in the past.
I wanted to see him, as we had good time. It was nice to see him. We had coffee, he had nostalgic chat, remembering the good times in the past.
Then, he invited me to see the renovation of his old apartment. This apartment was virtually was our home, when we used to date and it was just few 100 meters away. So, I agreed. Bad decision No.2.
When we went inside, it was all furniture covered in plastic bags, and floors in white dust from the renovation works. But no one in sight. I asked him, where are the builders and workers. He told me they were off for today. So he knew the house was empty. He held my hand and led me to his old room. It brought sweet memories of when we used to laugh, cuddle, and sleep. Even though, there were no old furniture left, I could close my eyes, and passed months and years would have gone, and I could still see and smell his old room, just like in movies. Then, he kissed me. My heart was racing and ready to explode. He have kissed me so many times before, I was used to it, I knew it, I tasted his lips before like thousand times. But, it was all different this time. He tasted different, his kisses seemed different. I loved my boyfriend, but couldn't resist he kiss of my ex. Somehow, I felt guilty inside, while kissing my ex. It didn't give me the pleasure as it used to. Bad decision No. 3.
It was obvious, he wanted me. My ex was coming on to me. I panicked. I felt guilty. It didn't feel right. I was shacking, I was fighting. My thoughts ran like a lighting through my head "I didn't want this to happen, and how come I am here?" Now, I did not want that excitement that I was so eager to get. It was all wrong.
After a while, I jumped off from him, wiping my mouth from his kisses. Probably, I looked mad, as he stared at me as if I were. I said "I am sorry, I can't." I fixed my hear, my clothes, and ran out from his apartment. My heart was restless and beating like drum. I was shacking. "What if my boyfriend saw me going in with him? What if he knew what I was doing? What if someone saw us and told him and he assumed I cheated on him?" Those were the random questions that murdered my brain in and out. I ran. I ran until the main road and got the taxi. I was scared. I didn't do the wrongdoing, but could be blames as. I could have lost my loved one and ruined my relationship. In the evening, was I like a little scared kitten. Couldn't go far from my BF, was hugging him, kissing him. Wanted his assurance that he still loves me. I have almost cheated on him. Bad decision No.4: actually gone and married my boyfriend :)
So, this is the story of me, when I got closest to cheating loved one. It taught me a lesson. As Mongolians say, "If you brave it do it, if not don't even start!"
When we went inside, it was all furniture covered in plastic bags, and floors in white dust from the renovation works. But no one in sight. I asked him, where are the builders and workers. He told me they were off for today. So he knew the house was empty. He held my hand and led me to his old room. It brought sweet memories of when we used to laugh, cuddle, and sleep. Even though, there were no old furniture left, I could close my eyes, and passed months and years would have gone, and I could still see and smell his old room, just like in movies. Then, he kissed me. My heart was racing and ready to explode. He have kissed me so many times before, I was used to it, I knew it, I tasted his lips before like thousand times. But, it was all different this time. He tasted different, his kisses seemed different. I loved my boyfriend, but couldn't resist he kiss of my ex. Somehow, I felt guilty inside, while kissing my ex. It didn't give me the pleasure as it used to. Bad decision No. 3.
It was obvious, he wanted me. My ex was coming on to me. I panicked. I felt guilty. It didn't feel right. I was shacking, I was fighting. My thoughts ran like a lighting through my head "I didn't want this to happen, and how come I am here?" Now, I did not want that excitement that I was so eager to get. It was all wrong.
After a while, I jumped off from him, wiping my mouth from his kisses. Probably, I looked mad, as he stared at me as if I were. I said "I am sorry, I can't." I fixed my hear, my clothes, and ran out from his apartment. My heart was restless and beating like drum. I was shacking. "What if my boyfriend saw me going in with him? What if he knew what I was doing? What if someone saw us and told him and he assumed I cheated on him?" Those were the random questions that murdered my brain in and out. I ran. I ran until the main road and got the taxi. I was scared. I didn't do the wrongdoing, but could be blames as. I could have lost my loved one and ruined my relationship. In the evening, was I like a little scared kitten. Couldn't go far from my BF, was hugging him, kissing him. Wanted his assurance that he still loves me. I have almost cheated on him. Bad decision No.4: actually gone and married my boyfriend :)
So, this is the story of me, when I got closest to cheating loved one. It taught me a lesson. As Mongolians say, "If you brave it do it, if not don't even start!"
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